Online dating has exhausted me, with very little results to show for it. So, now what? What’s the plan of attack for a singleton who just lost her last singleton friend to engagement and works in an office surrounded by women. No people, get your mind outta da gutter.
I need a strategy that removes my smiling face holding a cocktail from the world wide web and gets my ass in the real world where real men live. I shall start…. at coffee shops. Sure, I’ll drain my bank account with latte after mocha-chinos, but wasn’t I doing that anyways by subscribing to the joke of online dating? And, yes, I’ll be jittery to the point of causing grave concern of co-workers who will wonder why I’m shaking so much I can’t type an e-mail, all in hopes and dreams of Mr. Psuedo-Intellectual-wearing glasses-with-a-bow-tie and jamming out to some indie band I’ve never heard of buying me my TNSVLXH (tall nonfat skinny vanilla latte extra hot).
Going after two plan of attacks. Repeat locations and valley-wide. Repeat locations meaning hitting up the same coffee shops around the same time to help increase my chances. Psych 101 taught me allllll about proximity, people. And valley-wide to help increase my statistical sample size. Sure I’ll incur added costs of gas and wear and tear on the old Vibe, however we all know Chandler is brewing with single engineers just looking for a hot thang to take home to meet mom. Me.
And one last added variance to the scheme of all schemes – corporate vs. mom & pop. Starbucks vs. Lux. Intel vs. graphic design consultant.
Can I get a cuppa Joe?
Just me...and my shoes 